How To Find The “Brightside” Amidst the Blahs
Feeling heavy and weighed down at work?
Are you getting frustrated because something is not happening for you yet you’re seeing other people around you scooping up opportunities, promotions, awards, and raises?
Do you feel like you are “behind” in life or your career?
Are you experiencing days where you are on top of the world and then the next feeling like you can’t do anything right?
If someone told you to “Look on the bright side” right now, deep in your soul would you want to flip them the bird?
I am sensing a wave of heaviness right now with some people experiencing incredibly positive shifts but, on the flipside, also like nothing is happening for you.
You want to do well and achieve all those juicy New Year goals but there is this nagging feeling like you are invisible and screaming at the top of your lungs but somehow in silence….
“Is this thing on?”….”Can anyone hear me?”… *taps the mic*
The reality of failure is hitting all too close to home.
But I assure you; YOU ARE NOT FAILING.
You are just a high-achieving, high-performer who needs to take a minute.
Here’s why…
In the fast-paced, hyper-connected, instant gratification everything needs to happen now world we live in, it's common to find high-performing individuals battling overwhelming anxiety that can overshadow even their brightest days.
Despite your achievements and successes, you may be trapped in a cycle of stress, dissatisfaction, and a general feeling of "blah."
Even when things seem bright, you are unable to look on the “Brightside”.
So, what's driving this epidemic of anxiety among high achievers, and more importantly, how can we break free from its grip to rediscover joy and fulfillment? Here are my hot take and tips.
THE DRIVERS (aka High-Performing Anxiety’s BFFs)
You’re Living in a Pressure Cooker of Performance
We are often driven by a relentless pursuit of success and excellence.
Whether in our careers, personal pursuits, or relationships, we set lofty goals and push ourselves to exceed expectations.
While this ambition and drive can be admirable traits, they can also create a pressure cooker environment where stress and anxiety thrive.
Can anyone relate?
The relentless pursuit of perfection, coupled with the fear of failure and the constant comparison to peers, can leave you feeling forever inadequate.
The pressure to maintain a facade of success only adds to the burden, leading to a sense of isolation and disconnection from others.
(maybe it’s time to take a mini break from social media?)
You’re Stuck in a Perfectionism Trap
Perfectionism is a double-edged sword that often plagues high achievers (and Virgos, I know because I am one).
While it can be a driving force behind success, it also sets unrealistic standards that are impossible to meet.
You feel every setback becomes a personal failure, every mistake a reflection of self-worth, leading to a never-ending cycle of self-doubt and criticism.
This unattainable pursuit of perfection leaves little room for enjoyment or appreciation of the present moment. You are so focused on reaching the next milestone that you overlook the simple pleasures of life, leading to a sense of emptiness and dissatisfaction.
SPOILER ALERT: There is no possible way you can ask for more without having gratitude for what is already going well in your life. More to come on that but in the meantime, start writing down one thing every day you are grateful for.
You’re Not Prioritizing Boundaries
You can break free from the grip of anxiety and reclaim a sense of joy and fulfillment, but to truly embrace this new way of living, you must prioritize setting healthy boundaries. And no, a boundary is not a candy bar sold in CVS… they are a real thing.
This means learning to say no to excessive demands and obligations and carving out time for rest, relaxation, and rejuvenation.
AMEN TO THAT PEOPLE.
Practicing mindfulness and meditation can also be powerful tools for managing stress and anxiety along with cultivating present-moment awareness where you can learn to quiet the chatter of the mind and find peace amid the chaos.
Take off that damn Apple watch from your wrist and silence your notifications or maybe it is time for a Zen Den or a She-Shack?
OK MEGHAN, BUT WHAT CAN I DO TO GET OFF THIS HAMSTER WHEEL AND LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE?
First, you must cultivate gratitude and perspective.
In the pursuit of success, it's easy to lose sight of all the good that is happening around us.
Cultivating a practice of gratitude can help us (aka high performers) shift our focus from what's lacking to what's abundant in our lives. By acknowledging and appreciating the small joys and victories you can find fulfillment and meaning beyond our day-to-day challenges.
One of my favorite things is to head out for a walk after a stressful day embracing the beauty that is nature with gratitude for breathing in fresh air in my lungs with ease.
Yes, it can be that simple.
Perspective is also key to overcoming the overwhelm of high performance.
By zooming out and viewing your struggles from 10,000 feet, you can gain clarity and insight into your priorities and values. This can help you realign your goals and actions with what truly matters, leading to a greater sense of purpose and fulfillment.
Now grab a piece of paper and fill it up with 10 things you are grateful for, today.
And lastly, find the JOY in the journey.
Overcoming the overwhelming anxiety of high performance requires a shift in mindset from outcome-oriented to process-oriented.
Instead of fixating on the end goal, embrace the journey itself, with all its ups and downs, twists and turns.
Finding joy in the process of growth and learning allows you to free yourself from the shackles of perfectionism and rediscover the passion and enthusiasm that fueled your ambitions in the first place.
It's not about reaching the destination; it's about savoring the moments along the way and finding beauty in the ordinary.
By prioritizing setting boundaries, cultivating gratitude and perspective, and finding joy in the journey, you can break free from the blahs and overwhelm and rediscover the joy and fulfillment that life has to offer and even on the darkest days, see the bright side.
Go get outside and enjoy life (sans your technology please, that email can wait).
xx Meghan
My new Season of the Pivot with Purpose Podcast is a MUST listen to help you feel your best and realize you are NOT alone in what you may be struggling with, life, career, health, your business.
Pop us in your ears during your next commute to work, walk outside, or make us a part of your morning routine.
Access all episodes here: https://www.meghanhoule.com/pivot-with-purpose-podcast
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